How do you know when to stop fighting?
Is it when you realize love is not a war?
How do you know when to stop caring?
Is it when the other person doesn't care more?
How do you know enough is enough?
Is it when the tears refuse to stream down your face?
How do you know when to let go?
Is it when he keeps tugging for space?
How do you know when it's time to quit trying?
Is it when you see that it's all in vain?
How do you know?
I dont.
All I know how to do is fight for the ones I care about, all I know how to do is care, and try and never let go.
Much can be said for the absence of sound, the loudness of the silence can be deafening. It forces you to see the formerly unseen...it makes an unknown know, and it thrusts you to a place where
all you thought and swore to be real and true is not.
I just had an argument with someone that was so silent it scared me. The feeling of my mind racing trying to figure out what was so possibly wrong the person could barely look at me, killed me in so many ways. I tried...maybe too hard to find out what was the issue that was so large is filled up our space, the comfort I found in them replaced by uncertainty; as if I stared at a stranger.
So yes, I tried, and failed miserably. There were no shedding of tears nor yelling, the silence of it all shut my yelps and held back the tears. Now I finally realize why. Finding out what is so totally 'wrong' scares the shit out of me. I'm afraid of finding a crack in the foundation of what I claim to be so near and dear to my heart. Something I thought could never be broken or weakened.
This could be the problem, holding someone so close you forget they are human and they indeed are flawed. I think I can deal with the flawed nature of this person, I just wish they would be willing to share it with me, the way I share my hopes, dreams, and misgivings with them.
The realization that maybe, just maybe, they don't see me the way I see them...
that is enough to bring me to tears. I'm willing more than anything to set things
right, I just hope the feelings are reciprocated.
So no, I don't know.
I think that's the most frightening part of all.
xoxo
pfh
